The Tone Ranger

Though I try really hard to keep quotes from the prickly German philosopher Frederick Nietzsche to a minimum, sometimes I can’t help myself: “One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed,” he wrote. It’s true in writing also – even writers whose ideas are excellent may irritate and offend if the tone isn't effective or appropriate. By tone I mean your attitude toward your reader. For instance, a phrase that seems innocuous to you (“as you know”) may be perceived as presumptuous, offensive, or patronizing to others. When this happens in everyday conversation we usually realize it immediately because the person with whom we’re speaking gives us visual cues – and we can modulate our tone immediately. In written communication, we don't get this instantaneous feedback, so we have to pay particular attention to tone to ensure that our message breaks through. Put yourself in your readers’ shoes (especially if they’re Prada) and: Write at the appropriate level of difficulty – when using necessary lingo, ten-dollar-words, of-the-moment slang, or potentially obscure references, indicate meaning (for instance, I didn’t want to assume you’d know who Nietzsche was, so I slipped in a brief identification) Write with the appropriate level of formality – if your intended readers are Fortune 500 CEOs, you may want to be more formal in tone than if your intended audience solely comprises rock critics Avoid sarcasm, self-righteousness, and flattery – it’s hard to pull off Stay out of your readers’ personal space – in other words, barring an invitation to a party or an annual Christmas letter, your readers aren’t your friends, they’re your readers Don’t write when you’re in a bad mood – it shows Respect diversity – fortunately, not everyone’s a middle-aged white guy like me One of the reasons emoticons and acronyms in e-mail are so popular is that they connote immediate tone. But because we don’t use them in the type of material we usually produce – LOL – we have to rely on our writerly skill and savvy to convey the right tone.

Note: Tone is actually pretty hard to talk about, since one man's sneer is another man's smile. When I was a boy my mother used to always say, "Don't take that tone with me," and my response was always the same: "What tone?" (I knew the tone she was referring to, of course, but I also knew my response would annoy her more and, at the time, unfortunately, that seemed important.) Still, for more on tone in writing, read this, this, and this.

Comments

[Sara]

Cool Dan! Welcome to the blogging world! Love the blog. And totally love learning about tone... it drives me nuts!

[Angelo Fernando]

Dan

I've been waiting for a blog that pays this kind of attention to language --beyond the style books and Strunk & White. Thanks for starting this.

[covert.c]

I plead guilty to several tone infractions. I'm going to enjoy this blog; it's already been helpful!

Thanks...

[Charlemagne Solanor]

I can't agree more. Here in the Philippines people's emotions are often mistaken for something else when they are conveyed via text messaging. Emoticons sometimes help, though.

[davidbdale]

Great! Now, is there any way you can deliver the same advice to radio and TV pundits who so very often undermine their own best ideas with sarcasm, rhetorical questions, misdirection and flippancy?

It's extremely tiresome to wade through all the attitude looking for an reasoned opinion clearly stated.

[Paul Chaney]

Dan, I love your advice, and join the others in saying welcome to the blogosphere. I came through Steve's post to find you.

I don't mean to be critical, but may I make a suggestion? Reading online is difficult as monitors don't make for the best interface. When there is a long paragraph it's even more difficult.

I'd like to suggest breaking the paragraphs into more scannable chunks. It may fly in the face of good grammar to do so, but sure makes digesting the information easier.

Also, the bullet points are very close together. I know Typepad doesn't make editing the style sheet easy, but some spacing in between each of those would be good as well.

Again, not intending to be critical, but these old eyes need all the help they can get! :-)

[Mark Goren]

Dan:
This is a seriously great blog. Tell me if you've ever heard this one. I once worked for a creative director who insisted that no comma be used unless there were four or more items/names/whatnot listed. Ever hear that one?

[Dan Santow]

First of all, thanks to you all for commenting today, as well as to my colleague and fellow blogger, Steve Rubel (http://www.micropersuasion.com/), through whom many of you found Word Wise. Please continue to post your thoughts, ideas, and suggestions.

Paul, I agree with everything you said. I’m still learning the ins and outs of Typepad – over the next few weeks my Monday posting should become easier to read, though. My friend and colleague Jeffrey Treem (http://insidethecubicle.blogs.com) has been patiently answering my questions but I don’t want to push him over the edge. I’m limiting myself to a six questions a day.

Mark, I’ve never before heard that “rule” (operative punctuation: quotation marks), and probably for a good reason. Generally speaking, it’s just plain wrong, though I suppose maybe there’s a tradition somewhere in some field about which I know nothing (bacteriology? philately? agribusiness?) where one does not use a comma except in the circumstances noted by your former creative director.

[Idan]

Nice blog and post. I'm curious, why "Frederick" and not "Friedrich"? It's the first time I see this use.

[Dan Santow]

Idan, to be honest, I’m not sure why I used Frederick instead of Friedrich when referring to Nietzsche. It might be that the source from which I got the quote used Frederick. Frederick isn’t wrong (according to Wikpedia, he was named after King Frederick William IV of Prussia), but by asking about it you imply it’s at least unusual, and you’re right.

[Max Kalehoff]

Hi Dan,
I like your stuff. I'm curious if your coaching includes juxtaposition of multimedia with writing. You mentioned tone and emoticons, but what about audio, photos and video. To be sure, if you strip writing to its core, you have only words. But, words have always been capable of being enhanced or mutated with multimedia. That's more true today than ever, and becoming moreso. Heck, your headshot and smile in the sidebar of your blog influenced my perception of your writing!

As for times you shouldn't write -- like when you're in a bad mood -- here's another: when you're drunk. I wonder how many written communications we come across everyeday, where the author was drunk or under the influence of some mind-altering drug.

Cheers,
Max

[Mark Goren]

Dan, allow me to clarify. When I stated that no comma be used unless there were four or more items/names/whatnot listed, I really meant "no comma be used before the and unless the and comes before the fourth (or additional) item.

[Dan Santow]

Max, thanks for your thoughtful comments. At Edelman, we, too, are really interested in the interaction of all sorts of media and how we can use it with, for and on behalf of our clients. We recently introduced something called StoryCrafter, a social media release that incorporates hyperlinks, social bookmarking, multimedia, comment and trackback, among other things. I think it’s pretty cool. http://www.edelman.com/news/storycrafter/EdelmanNews.aspx?hid=171

As for writing while you’re drunk – while I won’t recommend it, some of the greatest literature ever written was probably created while its authors were three sheets to the wind.

Mark, thanks for the clarification.

[Amanda Goh]

Always a big fan! Keep it coming.